Dear Fellow Nice Guys,
I call this meeting of Nice Guys Anonymous to order. Please stop fighting over who is giving up the good seats to who. You can apologize later :-)
OK, tonight we'll be watching a short (20-minute) movie. It's called The Power of Vulnerability: a TED Talk by Brene Brown. In it, Brene Brown (she's a social worker with way too much education) studied people who are happy and connected. And this is what she found - it all hinged on vulnerability.
This both floored me (for it's simplicity) and rang absolutely true at the same time. It was instinctively obvious.
Her definition of vulnerability included the courage to be imperfect; the compassion to be kind (to self first, and then to others); and, connection as a result of authenticity.
And it was her view that this all hinged on our view of our own worthiness - did we think we were worthy of love and affection and acceptance even though we are flawed, imperfect human beings.
Well, my friends, I know that what I've always wanted was true connection. It's the drug my body craves. And that the counter-forces we often face (she names them as shame, fear, and lack of worthiness) keep us from experiencing it.
It is my belief, from 45 years on this planet, that she has gotten this right.
So I say to you - watch this video!!! And know that you are worthy, that you are lovable, likable, acceptable, even in your current state. This is the essence of grace.
I truly wish you all the best, yours, Peter
Therapist for Nice Guys